The need to eat is not just a matter for the body. Often even the mind vents on the need for food, some impulses that, if uncontrolled, can sabotage any effort made to lose weight. Keeping one’s eating habits under control therefore starts from the self-control of one’s physical and mental wellbeing. We talk about it with Dr. Agnese Rossi, psychotherapist at Humanitas Gavazzeni.
That uncontrolled need for food
It is called “emotional hunger” and it comes when we most need to be comforted in times of greatest stress and difficulty. Consciously or unconsciously, when we face a particularly negative problem or moment in our lives, we often eat more and regardless of whether the food is healthy. It is not by chance that in these moments we favor foods with a high calorific value, very sweet, very salty or fatty, foods with a high palatability index, or rather of palatability, which is accentuated by the addition of substances that make industrial foods more tasty and that lead us to eat more of them, often without realizing it.
Love, Food and Weight Loss: What are the connections?
Eating is often the easiest and most immediate way to suppress or soothe negative emotions, such as stress, anger, fear, boredom, sadness, and loneliness. Major life events or, more commonly, everyday problems can trigger negative emotions that lead to eating emotionally and disrupt the efforts made to lose weight. That is why it is necessary to be more vigilant during the periods in which we live:
- Relational conflicts
- Work Stress
- Fatigue, dissatisfaction
- Financial pressures
- Health Problems
Some people eat less in the face of strong emotions. Others, on the other hand, react by eating impulsively and quickly consuming everything in front of them, without thinking about it. Food becomes a distraction, which is why we talk about “comfort food”: sometimes it is the only indiscriminate response to our emotional difficulties, in the absence of other expressive possibilities. Anger, boredom, anxiety, dissatisfaction, a sense of inner emptiness or other emotions are often confused with hunger, which in these cases is not physical hunger, but has psychological origins. All this can trigger a vicious circle between mental distress and excessive food intake, two aspects that risk influencing each other and can cause feelings of shame and guilt.
How to break the vicious circle
Eating to forget can have an even worse effect on our psychophysical health. In addition to the negative emotions, destined to return even after a binge, there is the problem of excess pounds, guilt, and rejection of one’s body. Therefore, here are some tips to break this vicious circle:
– Keep a food diary. Write down what you eat, how much you eat, when you eat, how you feel when you eat, and how hungry you are (physical hunger, that is, when we perceive the empty stomach). Over time, you might see modes that reveal the connection between mood, emotions, quantity, and quality of food.
– Learn to listen to your stomach: imagine your stomach as an inflatable balloon, ask yourself how many hours have passed since your last meal and feel if your stomach is full, half full or empty. If you have eaten recently and feel empty, do not eat immediately, but listen to what emotion you are feeling: it can be an emotional void, but not physical hunger, which does not fill by eating, but by giving a name to this emotion and trying to process it.
– Learn to distinguish between physical and emotional hunger – the balloon image can help. Physical hunger and satiety are physiological signals that sometimes we do not listen to, but they are valuable indicators that guide us to relate in a balanced way to food.
– Give your stress a boost. If stress helps increase your emotional appetite, try a stress management technique, such as yoga, meditation, physical activity that will satisfy you or deep breathing. Ask yourself if your hunger is real or if it stems from the need to relieve stress.
– Ask for help. You are more likely to succumb to emotional hunger if you lack a good support network. Relying on relatives and friends or considering joining a support group can be a good solution in times of difficulty, just as it is essential to turn to a specialist who points you in the right direction, especially to help you be aware of your emotional world, which we cannot listen to if we immediately fill it with food.
– Fight boredom. Instead of snacking when you’re not hungry, get distracted and replace messy nutrition with healthier, more rewarding behavior. As soon as you feel emotionally hungry, take a walk, watch a movie, play with your pet, listen to music, read or call a friend, organize a meeting.
– Eliminate temptations. Don’t keep unhealthy foods in your home and if you feel angry, postpone your visit to the grocery store until your emotions are under control again. Moreover, don’t go shopping when you’re hungry, you’ll fill your cart with appetizing, but not very healthy, foods.
– Do not punish yourself. When you try to lose weight, you tend to make the mistake of limiting calories too much, repeatedly eating the same foods and banishing delicacies. This can only serve to increase the desire for food, especially in response to emotions difficult to handle otherwise. Eating satisfactory quantities of healthier foods, chewing slowly, appreciating the natural taste of food without too many seasonings or additions of industrial flavors, helps to educate us to taste, an important aspect to teach since childhood.
– Focus on the positive changes you’re making in your eating habits and give yourself the credit of making changes that will lead to healthier, more satisfying nutrition and help you better perceive your sense of satiety. All this can reinforce your self-esteem and acceptance of your body.
When to look for professional help
If you’ve tried to control yourself, but still can’t keep emotional hunger at bay, if you don’t clearly feel physical hunger before eating or satiety after a meal, or if you confuse emotions with the desire to fill up with food, consider starting a therapy with a professional. A psychotherapeutic and educational path can help you discover if you have a conflictual and problematic relationship with food or a real disturbance of eating behavior.
